How You Can Help Our Ailing Democracy

Join The Independent’s New Political Campaign for Us the Common People’s Way to Power!

My top ten policies would be:

1) All horse owners have to pick up their beasts’ droppings like dog owners do.
2) Big wooly hats should be the national costume.
3) David Hoyle should be our Queen.
4) Meals and chats with friends should be compulsory every week.
5) A 3-Day Week for Work (unless you want to work harder).
6) Bike lane equality on all roads.
7) Every month there should be a nationwide themed fancy dress night.
8) Women shouldn’t have to do anything apart from watch boxsets in the run up to and during their periods.
9) Special limited edition coins can’t be spent they have to be given to other more needy people.
10) All money spent on defence should be reallocated into education, health and the arts with immediate effect.

There’s always been more of us…

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